Behavior Blotter: Is Saying ‘Thank You’ Enough in Coronado?

I say ‘Thank You’ or ‘Thanks’ MANY times a day. I even say it each time a server refill my water glass and refill my chips and salsa at Miguel’s in Coronado. I noticed that I even say it when the situation calls for someone ELSE to thank ME – I guess I don’t want anyone to feel like they forgot and so I say it for THEM!

When someone goes OUT of their way to help you, you should make the same effort to let them as well as their peers know of their effort. Today with Yelp reviews and utter transparency of people’s services, products, and behaviors, there needs to be MORE positive feedback than the complaints and rants we see about the opposite.

Hypothesis: Saying ‘Thank You’ has become more of a social norm than an actual authentic expression of gratitude.

Evidence: We hear ‘Thanks’ for almost anything these days. Sure, the ‘Thanks’ from the sales person in the store is a thanks for the sale. When you say ‘Thanks’ to your server, is it for bringing your food? Or making sure your water is ALWAYS filled? When you say ‘Thanks’ to someone in your workplace for something they didn’t HAVE to do, do THEY know what you thanked them for?

Conclusions:

• Think about your experience for 5 seconds. Through reflection, you can deliver a more accurate measure of WHY you liked something about your interaction with the other person.

• Tell them why. They could be attentive to your table or they are proactive in helping the team or they are making a sacrifice of their time for you somehow. That type of ‘thanks’ will leave the receiver feeling great and knowing their effort is being recognized.

• Celebrate it with others. People who are kind, thoughtful, selfless, and who ‘do the right thing’, need to be recognized by touting them as role models in the world so others can learn from them…in fact, SCREAM it from on top of a mountain as that person should be celebrated, and recognized as a leader from behind the scenes.

Challenge: Make sure the next time you say ‘Thank You’, to your spouse or kids or someone serving you, say WHY!

Do YOU say ‘Thank You’ twenty times a day? When do you say more than just a ‘Thanks’?

Akshay facilitates workshops on leadership, communication, and teamwork for adults and children with Ziksana Consulting. Read his Behavior Blotter for more on his work and his observations. If you have any ideas for stories, please contact Akshay at [email protected]