We, the Coronado Scribes, consist of both professional and amateur writers. We have in common a desire to learn, by sharing our efforts and listening to other writers. We hold pressure-less sessions every Wednesday, at the Coronado Library conference room, starting at 1:30. Often we have guests who wish to just listen. They are welcome, and so are you. Each week on eCoronado, we feature a different piece of prose or poetry produced by one of our writers. Please feel free to comment or ask.
The 139th Annual Kennel Club All Breed Dog Idiom and Slang Show
Michael Lavin 3/18/15
The panel nominated Top Dog to be the judge
Charged to select perfection from this collection
Off she headed with her jargon decoder
Searching for the idioms at the top of her order.
Judged on how to refrain
Oh, how that can be a pain.
Smiles covering my lumpish nose and m weary eyes.
Please just let this sleeping dog lie.
Look fun- loving and start that waggle.
Move that tail from side to side without a tangle.
Appear secondary, controlling the whole
Tail wagging this dog would be my goal
Here comes the expert, look your best.
You got drunk last night at that cursed fest.
You need a remedy to lift your hangover fog.
So get ready to bite the hair of any dog.
Big Dog nears, get rid of that frown.
Make them think you are a clown.
Look eager to please to make the grade;
Hot Diggity Dog, what a charade
Quick, here comes the judge, find a book.
Fold down the corner of this gobbledygook.
Enable the reader to return
Using your Dog Ears to discern.
I am full of life with so much endurance.
My charge is to pursue a task with no assurance.
I am off hunting for prey, jam-packed with glee,
Always remembering to bark up the wrong tree
I repeat my story maybe four of five times
To anyone who can spare the time.
Irrelevant, absurd meant to bore,
My shaggy-dog stories always abhored.
I feel like taking a bite
Right out of the rump of that Shaggy crossbreed.
Those boring stories are making me feel nasty and mean.
I have to get control of my combative demeanor.
I am a junkyard dog;
What canine could be meaner?
The contest is getting cold.
Some panic to find the coal.
We are so glad, despite the panic,
Knowing silk quilts were out of sight.
It looks to us like a three dog’s night.
The whistle blew as the owners grabbed our tethers.
We marched around the room all together.
And just as fast as we were able,
The gnarly judge placed us up onto the table
The magistrate made her decision and to no one’s surprise,
The same dang dog won last year’s prize.
So graceful, slender, svelte and bright,
Don’t Let’s Go to the Dogs (won) Tonight
